Sept. 28, 2025
A True Story that Just Might Change How You Talk to Decisionmakers
I want to share with you a story of something that happened to me that I think carries some powerful lessons for how we approach not just advocacy, but pretty much everything.
But those lessons are only part of point. When you listen to this story, you’ll discover how storytelling can be one of the most effective tools for engaging others. But that engagement is not a given.
There’s a way to tell a story that pulls the listener in and has them totally immersed in the story. And there’s a way to tell that same story that will leave them checking their phone and wondering when this will be over.
In this episode, we share:
- Two powerful lessons I learned from the craziest decision I ever made
- Why being concise and to the point is not always the most effective way to engage a decisionmaker
- How our brains respond to effective storytelling that causes us to engage, retain what we hear, and even change our perspective
- The difference between a compelling and engaging story, and a “just the facts” story
- Four key ingredients of a story that cause engagement
Help spread the word! If you found value in this episode, I’d be grateful if you would leave a review on iTunes or wherever you listen. Your reviews help other nonprofit leaders find the podcast. Thanks!!
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You're listening to the Nonprofit Power Podcast.
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In today's episode, we share a true story that just might change how you talk to decision makers.
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So stay tuned.
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If you wanna have real and powerful influence over the money and policy decisions that impact your organization and the people you serve, then you're in the right place.
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I'm Kath Patrick, and I've helped dozens of progressive Nonprofit leaders take their organizations to new and higher levels of impact and success by building powerful influence with the decision makers that matter.
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It is possible to get a critical mass of the money and policy decision makers in your world to be as invested in your success as you are, to have them seeking you out as an equal partner and to have them.
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Bringing opportunities and resources to you.
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This podcast will help you do just that.
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Welcome to the Nonprofit Power Podcast.
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Hey there folks.
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Welcome to another episode of the Nonprofit Power Podcast.
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I'm so glad you're here for today's episode because I wanna share with you a story of something that happened to me that I think carries some powerful lessons for how we approach not just advocacy, but pretty much everything.
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A few years ago I needed to rehab after some major surgery that was for an injury that I had gotten.
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My goal was to get back to the fitness level I had before the injury had happened.
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And I was doing the rehab work, but gosh, it felt lonely and boring and slow.
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Not a recipe for continued motivation.
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I realized I needed a goal that wouldn't just be about getting back to okay, but would be about truly restoring fitness.
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So I decided to do a triathlon.
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I had never done one before.
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I'd seen a couple, and I knew some people who'd done them, but I'd never attempted anything like that myself.
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So basically knowing nothing, I decided to join a team to get some coaching and training and have the benefit of some other people around me working toward the same goal.
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I figured I already know how to run and ride a bike, but I know the swim is gonna be a challenge.
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I've never been a lap swimmer.
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My swimming has always just been kind of goofing around in lakes and rivers, and i'm gonna need a bunch of coaching there.
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I show up for the first swim workout at 5:30 in the morning.
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I've had to get up at 4:30 just to be there, and I'm not a morning person.
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I'm half asleep.
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I'm nervous, and I'm standing in what feels like really cold water with two or three other people.
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Listening to the coach tell us how this first practice is gonna go for those of us who are brand new to the team.
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I'm looking over, there's a dozen other lanes, and all those folks in those lanes are already doing the prescribed workout.
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But we're down here in the guppy lane and the coach says to me, show me your freestyle.
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I don't have a freestyle.
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That's why I'm here.
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He says, I don't care.
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Just show me what you got.
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I get about three strokes in and I realize I really don't have a freestyle.
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I know how to swim with my head out of the water, but I'm suddenly realizing I've never learned how to do the breathing part with your face in the water.
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So I fake it.
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Not well.
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And I thought I would never get to the end of that 25 meter lane.
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But the coach just said, well, we have a starting point, so we're gonna start working on things.
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And that's what we did.
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Each session, he would give us a couple things to work on so that we could get a little bit more competent each time.
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Eventually, I graduated to the lowest actual swimming lane.
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And I was sure I didn't belong there yet.
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I felt like I'll never be able to keep up with these folks.
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They're all doing this workout like it's nothing.
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And I'm struggling to get from one end of the pool to the other.
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And my race, the shortest possible triathlon there is, involves a 750 meter swim, which is about half a mile.
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Might as well be 10 miles as far as I'm concerned.
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About a month in one of the guys on the team says to me, eventually you'll be able to swim a mile like you walk a mile.
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That sounds fairly unattainable, but it plants the idea in my head.
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Maybe this could eventually feel easy?
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I keep working.
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I keep doing what the coaches tell me, and sure enough, I start to get better.
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I start to be able to swim first a hundred, then 200, then 400 meters without stopping.
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But there was another problem.
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I still had the bike and the run to deal with.
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I get copies of the complete training plan, and it's super complicated.
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Tons of shorthand I don't understand, and it feels like there's about five activities every day that I'm supposed to be doing.
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I was behind almost from day one.
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And the more I fell behind, the more stressed out I got.
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Then I went to a couple of bike and run coaching sessions and basically learned that I didn't really know much about how to bike or run either.
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That my technique was terrible.
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I wasn't doing things the way I should for optimal performance.
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So now I'm worrying about I'm not doing it right and I'm falling behind on the workout plan.
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And, and, and.
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It got to the point where one day I thought, I've gotta do just one thing where I feel competent.
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I'm just feeling like I'm incompetent at every piece of this.
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So I went for a long, hard, challenging hike in the mountains, where I feel my most competent.
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It was in April.
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There was still snow on the ground.
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The trail was a combination of snow and mud, slippery as can be.
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The air was cold, but the sun was shining and it felt warm on my back.
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I took a few deep breaths of clear mountain air and for the first time in a while began to relax.
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Even as my boots squished through the snow and the mud, I picked up my pace and I was happy as could be.
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Finally, I was doing something I know how to do.
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And with every stride, I felt more like myself, more grounded, more solid, more capable.
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I found the perfect lunch rock with a view.
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And I sat down on that cold but welcoming rock, and I'm staring out at mountainsides covered in early spring blossoms and just the first fuzzy yellow green of leaves beginning to bud, and that view is stretching for miles in front of me.
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I felt fully at home and fully grounded in my own capabilities again.
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And I thought to myself, I am gonna do this triathlon.
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There's gotta be a way to train for it that's not so complicated.
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I'm gonna find the simplest possible training plan that will still be effective and I'll do that.
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So when I got home, I found a book online, I bought it, and I started using the super simple, stripped down training plan.
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I didn't worry about whether my bike and run technique was optimal.
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I looked to the book for advice on what's the best way to start from zero and build your capacity at a reasonable pace.
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And wouldn't you know it, the day the book arrived was the exact amount of weeks before the race that the book said, this is the minimum number of weeks you need to train safely.
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I had gotten that book at exactly the right time to begin that training plan.
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I followed it.
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And I kept going to swim practice.
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And one day I swam 750 meters without stopping.
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It was then I knew that I was gonna be able to do the swim in this race.
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It might not be pretty, but I knew I could do it.
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So race day arrives.
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The race is being held at a state park with a campground.
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I drive down the night before and I set up my camp.
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I wake up before dawn and I have a little breakfast in the dark, making sure to get something in the tank before the race.
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I go down to the body marking area where they take a magic marker and they write your race number on your arm and your leg in great big writing so that they can spot you from a distance.
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And then I go set up my transition area.
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I put my bike in the stand.
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I have my bike shoes and my running shoes.
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I got my hydration and nutrition kit.
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I've got a little towel so I can dry off after the swim.
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Got all my stuff, I'm ready.
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And now there's nothing to do but wait.
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So the nerves start creeping in.
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I'm starting to feel my heart rate go up and my breathing get a little rapid.
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I try to take deep breaths to calm myself.
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I go down to the lake and I'm standing there in the cold wet sand, doing deep breathing and yoga, just calming and centering myself.
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But I didn't know yet that I had made a mistake.
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For the swim start, you can choose whether to swim with your age group or with a category called novice.
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I figured I belonged in the novice category, so that's what I signed up for.
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I figured that would be less stressful than all those super competitive people in the age groups.
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It turned out that I was a lot better prepared for this race than most of the people in the novice group.
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I wasn't great by any means, but I was confident that I could swim those 750 meters without it being an issue.
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And I'd never been afraid of open water.
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I grew swimming in it.
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But what I didn't know is that for a lot of people, the open water aspect of the swim is the scariest part.
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So I get in the water and I hold back.
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I don't wanna be the first to start swimming.
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I'll just hang here at the back of the pack and that'll feel much more calm.
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Wrong.
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I quickly catch up to most of the novice swimmers.
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And then I begin to realize,all around me a lot of people are panicking.
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They're flailing and thrashing, grabbing for the kayaks that are there for support.
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Cutting in front of me, trying to find something to grab onto.
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It's chaos.
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It takes a long time just to get through the thicket of panicking swimmers, but then I get out into fairly clear open water and I'm able to swim about two thirds of the course, more or less without interference.
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I finish the swim and I feel this rush of relief.
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I did it.
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I wade out of the water and I head for the transition area.
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I run across the gritty sand on the beach, and that feels really grounding to feel the sand between my toes and gritting beneath my feet.
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And then I hit the grass, which still has dew on it, and it's cool and refreshing.
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Plus it wipes the sand off my feet.
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I get to transition, towel off a little and get my bike jersey on and my bike shoes, and I'm ready to go.
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I hop on the bike and I get going a little bit and I clip in and I'm feeling good.
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Now since I was so late getting out of the water, I'm already near the end of the group for the bike, but it's fine.
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And I'm riding this clunker of a hybrid that weighs about a thousand pounds.
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So going uphill is really slow and a lot of work, and I'm watching a lot of people zipping by on their ultralight road bikes and feeling really envious.
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But I don't really care because at one point out in the middle of this long, straight stretch of Country road, the sun breaks through and it's warm on my back.
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The wind's hitting my face, and there's this huge field of golden flowers.
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I don't know what they are, but they're just beautiful in the sunshine, and they're giving off this sweet, fragrant smell.
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And I look around and I think, this is amazing.
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I'm having such a good time.
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I'm so happy in that moment just to be there and to be at this point more than halfway through my race and feeling pretty great.
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I keep on going.
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There's a bunch more hills to climb and each of them gets a little harder, but I'm doing it.
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I get to the end of the bike course and I remember to clip out.
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I get off the bike and I put my feet on the ground, and my legs are jello.
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I almost fall down.
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There's nothing there.
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My legs just give way.
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I walk to the transition area, holding myself up by my arms pressed into my bike, as my wobbly legs try to figure out how to walk on land.
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And I'm thinking, how am I gonna run if my legs don't work?
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But I regroup in transition, I change into my running shoes, sit down for a couple of minutes, get some electrolytes into me.
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And by the time I'm walking out of transition to start the run course, things are still a little wobbly, but I feel like, okay.
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I can at least walk, and probably in a minute or two I can run.
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And then I see the hill.
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I had visions of starting the run course strong and striding out at a good clip.
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And I'm confronted with this nearly vertical hill, straight up.
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Well, that's not a run, that's a walk.
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So I walk up the hill because that's what's possible in that moment.
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Thankfully, when I get to the top of the hill, things level out a little bit and I can start running.
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Not super fast, but I'm running and my legs are getting sturdier as I go.
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Figuring out how to function in that motion instead of the cycling motion.
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I have to say I don't remember much of the run course.
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It's kind of a blur.
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But I remember when I got to the only aid station, slowing down long enough to take a drink.
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And I'm so grateful because by this time the sun is now hot and it's beating down on my head and I can feel that I'm starting to get overheated and a little dehydrated.
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I take a drink of water, which feels so good sliding down my throat.
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Then I see some volunteers offering to pour water on your head and I make a beeline for them.
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As soon as that cool water hits my head, it feels so much better.
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I stand there feeling the water running through my hair and down my back cooling me and bringing me back to life.
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The next thing I remember is coming down the chute to the finish line.
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I'm exhausted by this point.
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It's hard going.
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I'm tempted to walk, but there's some pride involved.
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And then I hear the noise.
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Dozens of racers who've already finished are gathered around the finish line, cheering and encouraging all of us who are just now finishing the course.
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They're shouting and they're cheering, and there's cowbells and they're saying, you got this.
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Come on.
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You made it.
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Suddenly I feel about 10 feet tall and I find a burst of energy to run across that finish line.
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I did it.
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I met this big challenge I set for myself and I made it.
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I felt so good.
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And then there was this added joy and energy from the other racers cheering us on and high fives all around as each of us crossed the finish line.
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It's really hard to imagine a better finish for my first race.
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It wasn't perfect, but it was really good.
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And what I realized is that there were some powerful lessons in that experience for me.
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I learned that good enough is actually better than perfect.
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Because if I had tried to be perfect and follow the exact super complicated and very involved training plan, I wouldn't have been able to do it.
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It was too overwhelming.
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It was just too much to process in too short a time, and I would've stopped.
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I would've quit.
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Instead, I found a simpler path.
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I looked for the most direct line to the desired result, and I took it.
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And it was fine.
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I still have a lot more to learn to become a better cyclist, a better runner, a better swimmer, but what I had at that point was good enough to achieve my goal.
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And achieving that goal felt just as sweet with the training I'd been able to do, as it would have if I'd done everything perfectly and according to the designed training plan.
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The other important lesson was that the bigger the challenge you take on, the more important it is to find people to help and support you on the journey.
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Without the support of the swim coaches and my teammates, there's no way I would've been able to accomplish that 750 meter swim.
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And I've continued to work with the coaches, and now I'm happy to say that I absolutely can not only swim a mile, but a couple of miles, like I can walk a couple of miles.
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It feels good.
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It feels easy, just like walking.
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Another reason I told this story is to show the power of story to engage.
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If you think about the story I just shared with you.
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Even if you would never in a million years consider doing a triathlon, did you find yourself drawn into the story?
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And if you did, do you know why Maybe you're a triathlete and you were interested in the experience, but it's more likely that's not something that's even remotely on your radar.
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And yet you probably felt yourself being pulled in.
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Why did that happen?
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Part of the reason I shared the story is to be able to talk about what just happened here.
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What your experience as a listener was.
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And why it's different with that story than it would be if I did what we usually do when we're sharing information with decision makers.
00:17:15.836 --> 00:17:18.326
We tend to do the"just the facts" version.
00:17:19.086 --> 00:17:24.036
And If I were to give you the,"just the facts" version of the story I just told, it would be a lot shorter.
00:17:24.536 --> 00:17:27.506
And we always wanna be concise and get to the point with decision makers.
00:17:27.506 --> 00:17:28.826
We don't wanna waste their time.
00:17:29.424 --> 00:17:33.988
But when we do that, we give up the opportunity to engage them more fully.
00:17:34.901 --> 00:17:40.125
if I give you"just the facts" version of that same story, it would go something like this.
00:17:40.653 --> 00:17:45.272
I decided to do a triathlon and so I joined a team so I could get some training and coaching.
00:17:45.853 --> 00:17:50.133
I knew the swim would be the hardest part for me, so I really focused on that.
00:17:50.432 --> 00:17:57.873
And I got lots of extra coaching there and managed to get enough so that I could do the 750 meter distance for my swim.
00:17:58.423 --> 00:18:02.489
I figured I already knew how to bike and run, so I wasn't too worried about that.
00:18:02.989 --> 00:18:07.826
The only thing about the team was that they had these super involved training plans that really didn't work for me.
00:18:07.826 --> 00:18:13.346
So I just got a book that had a more concise version that was easier for me to follow.
00:18:13.346 --> 00:18:14.717
And it turned out to be good enough.
00:18:15.233 --> 00:18:16.463
I had a pretty good race.
00:18:16.653 --> 00:18:23.503
Some weird stuff happened during the swim where a lot of the novice swimmers who were in front of me kind of freaked out and got in my way.
00:18:23.554 --> 00:18:26.253
And that was difficult, but I managed.
00:18:26.284 --> 00:18:28.294
And then the bike went pretty good.
00:18:28.753 --> 00:18:35.986
I realized that my hybrid bike was definitely not the bike for that job, and I wished I had a road bike, but oh well.
00:18:36.691 --> 00:18:38.211
And then the run was okay.
00:18:38.211 --> 00:18:40.730
I was pretty tired and hot, but I did okay.
00:18:40.760 --> 00:18:46.411
And then at the end it was really cool'cause a bunch of the other racers were there cheering and that was nice.
00:18:47.007 --> 00:18:50.396
So then I finished and I was really happy that I achieved my goal.
00:18:50.616 --> 00:18:55.146
I achieved the challenge that I set for myself and I also got a lot of rehab done, so that was really good.
00:18:55.864 --> 00:19:01.779
That's the"just the facts" version Is that as interesting and compelling as the first version that I shared?
00:19:02.556 --> 00:19:04.882
And if it isn't, what's the difference?
00:19:05.192 --> 00:19:14.905
Why was the first version so much more interesting and engaging than the much quicker, much shorter just the facts" version that I just did?
00:19:15.561 --> 00:19:21.924
And are there any carryover lessons from that comparison to how we're engaging decision makers?
00:19:22.805 --> 00:19:26.914
I wanna share with you the key elements of a story that actually engages.
00:19:27.622 --> 00:19:32.291
Number one, it engages emotion, it connects to feeling.
00:19:32.291 --> 00:19:35.364
It also connects to the senses.
00:19:35.753 --> 00:19:38.483
Sights, sounds, smells, tastes.
00:19:38.983 --> 00:19:46.714
And it creates an alternate reality, another world that the listener becomes immersed in.
00:19:47.565 --> 00:19:53.234
When you do all three of those things, you have a listener who is fully engaged.
00:19:54.025 --> 00:20:05.595
And what's really interesting is that when that happens, what's going on from a brain science perspective is that there's a bunch of things that are happening at the same time.
00:20:06.246 --> 00:20:13.542
So first of all, when we're being given facts and data, two very small little spots in our brain light up.
00:20:13.942 --> 00:20:15.653
The data processing areas.
00:20:16.252 --> 00:20:20.032
And that's fine, but those don't involve much of the brain.
00:20:20.532 --> 00:20:29.561
When we hear a story that triggers our senses--sight, sound, smell, taste-- huge parts of our brain light up.
00:20:30.061 --> 00:20:32.731
It's involving all different parts of the brain at the same time.
00:20:33.001 --> 00:20:37.432
And when we engage emotions, other huge parts of the brain light up.
00:20:38.031 --> 00:20:40.162
And a couple of phenomena start to occur.
00:20:40.534 --> 00:20:42.880
There's a phenomenon called neural coupling.
00:20:43.509 --> 00:20:55.432
Where, when a story is being told that includes those three ingredients, the listener's brain lights up in all the same places that the storyteller's brain is lighting up.
00:20:55.932 --> 00:20:58.092
They're actually mirroring one another.
00:20:58.592 --> 00:21:01.580
And that's the indicator of total engagement.
00:21:02.371 --> 00:21:16.488
The other thing that happens is this thing called narrative transportation, which is a fancy way of saying that the listener is transported into the world that is being created by the storyteller, and they're fully immersed in it.
00:21:16.607 --> 00:21:25.589
And when that happens, they're experiencing all the emotions and the sights and the sounds and the smells and the tension that are woven into the story.
00:21:26.089 --> 00:21:30.115
And when that happens, a bunch of brain chemicals get released.
00:21:30.615 --> 00:21:36.788
And that's causes more retention and I've heard it phrased this way.
00:21:37.151 --> 00:21:39.885
It causes the listener to see things they can't unsee.
00:21:40.705 --> 00:21:43.660
They visualized a thing in a new way.
00:21:44.079 --> 00:21:47.289
They visualized an experience and now it's in their head.
00:21:48.009 --> 00:21:56.435
That image, that sensation, whatever it is, that impression is now planted in their brain and it's gonna stay with'em.
00:21:57.182 --> 00:22:00.359
And that's what we want to be able to do when we're engaging decision makers.
00:22:00.737 --> 00:22:05.010
We want them so in it that they can't forget.
00:22:05.070 --> 00:22:08.730
They can't ignore the important stuff that we're telling them.
00:22:09.421 --> 00:22:11.611
And it becomes especially important with data.
00:22:12.030 --> 00:22:21.060
Because data is so easy to glaze over when we're hearing facts and data because those two tiny bits of the brain are involved and not much else, and the rest of the brain is off doing whatever it's doing.
00:22:21.901 --> 00:22:25.891
But when the whole brain is immersed, that's when you get retention.
00:22:25.891 --> 00:22:27.030
That's when you get engagement.
00:22:27.830 --> 00:22:32.061
So if you think about the immersive version of the story that I shared with you.
00:22:32.561 --> 00:22:34.271
I did all those things.
00:22:34.771 --> 00:22:42.477
I described the emotions, the worry, the nervousness, the stress, the elation, the exhaustion.
00:22:42.876 --> 00:22:47.977
All of that was described in detail of how it felt to be in that experience.
00:22:48.477 --> 00:22:55.507
I described the sights and the sounds and the smells of the environment in each of the parts of the story.
00:22:56.007 --> 00:22:58.606
And then there's one more ingredient that's really important.
00:22:59.027 --> 00:23:02.845
Which is that a good story builds tension and then releases it.
00:23:03.345 --> 00:23:06.644
And if you're telling a longer story, you do that repeatedly.
00:23:07.095 --> 00:23:13.575
But you can do it in a short form with a decision maker just around data where you build tension and release it once.
00:23:14.144 --> 00:23:16.394
But in this case, it was repeated.
00:23:16.934 --> 00:23:24.734
I would get to a place where I thought I was in good shape and I had overcome a thing, and then another challenge appears and the cycle begins again.
00:23:25.428 --> 00:23:28.651
It's that building anticipation and then releasing it.
00:23:28.740 --> 00:23:31.230
Our brains love to anticipate.
00:23:31.260 --> 00:23:32.431
It's what they're built to do.
00:23:32.830 --> 00:23:37.181
So anything that builds anticipation pulls the listener in even more.
00:23:37.988 --> 00:23:39.382
So let me ask you.
00:23:40.041 --> 00:23:46.221
Did you experience any of that with the"just the facts" version of the story that I shared afterwards?
00:23:46.858 --> 00:23:48.659
Which of those stories had you leaning in?
00:23:48.749 --> 00:23:52.229
Which of those stories had you, eh, not that interested?
00:23:53.086 --> 00:23:58.425
There's much more to talk about with how we build effective stories, especially around data.
00:23:58.516 --> 00:24:00.945
And we'll be digging into that in future episodes.
00:24:01.215 --> 00:24:14.376
But for today, I wanted to introduce you to a really clear example of a story that is deliberately built to engage, and then a version of that same story that's just the facts.
00:24:15.621 --> 00:24:20.250
And that you can tell by your own response, was not particularly engaging.
00:24:20.993 --> 00:24:27.586
Some food for thought as you think about how you're going to plan your next conversation with a decision maker.
00:24:28.125 --> 00:24:32.655
Thanks for listening and I'll see you in the next episode right here on the Nonprofit Power Podcast.
00:00:00.050 --> 00:00:02.629
You're listening to the Nonprofit Power Podcast.
00:00:02.779 --> 00:00:09.230
In today's episode, we share a true story that just might change how you talk to decision makers.
00:00:09.439 --> 00:00:10.759
So stay tuned.
00:00:17.027 --> 00:00:25.937
If you wanna have real and powerful influence over the money and policy decisions that impact your organization and the people you serve, then you're in the right place.
00:00:26.567 --> 00:00:39.557
I'm Kath Patrick, and I've helped dozens of progressive Nonprofit leaders take their organizations to new and higher levels of impact and success by building powerful influence with the decision makers that matter.
00:00:40.186 --> 00:00:52.726
It is possible to get a critical mass of the money and policy decision makers in your world to be as invested in your success as you are, to have them seeking you out as an equal partner and to have them.
00:00:52.786 --> 00:00:55.576
Bringing opportunities and resources to you.
00:00:56.176 --> 00:00:58.307
This podcast will help you do just that.
00:00:58.756 --> 00:01:01.786
Welcome to the Nonprofit Power Podcast.
00:01:07.399 --> 00:01:08.088
Hey there folks.
00:01:08.088 --> 00:01:11.028
Welcome to another episode of the Nonprofit Power Podcast.
00:01:11.358 --> 00:01:26.448
I'm so glad you're here for today's episode because I wanna share with you a story of something that happened to me that I think carries some powerful lessons for how we approach not just advocacy, but pretty much everything.
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A few years ago I needed to rehab after some major surgery that was for an injury that I had gotten.
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My goal was to get back to the fitness level I had before the injury had happened.
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And I was doing the rehab work, but gosh, it felt lonely and boring and slow.
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Not a recipe for continued motivation.
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I realized I needed a goal that wouldn't just be about getting back to okay, but would be about truly restoring fitness.
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So I decided to do a triathlon.
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I had never done one before.
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I'd seen a couple, and I knew some people who'd done them, but I'd never attempted anything like that myself.
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So basically knowing nothing, I decided to join a team to get some coaching and training and have the benefit of some other people around me working toward the same goal.
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I figured I already know how to run and ride a bike, but I know the swim is gonna be a challenge.
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I've never been a lap swimmer.
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My swimming has always just been kind of goofing around in lakes and rivers, and i'm gonna need a bunch of coaching there.
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I show up for the first swim workout at 5:30 in the morning.
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I've had to get up at 4:30 just to be there, and I'm not a morning person.
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I'm half asleep.
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I'm nervous, and I'm standing in what feels like really cold water with two or three other people.
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Listening to the coach tell us how this first practice is gonna go for those of us who are brand new to the team.
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I'm looking over, there's a dozen other lanes, and all those folks in those lanes are already doing the prescribed workout.
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But we're down here in the guppy lane and the coach says to me, show me your freestyle.
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I don't have a freestyle.
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That's why I'm here.
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He says, I don't care.
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Just show me what you got.
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I get about three strokes in and I realize I really don't have a freestyle.
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I know how to swim with my head out of the water, but I'm suddenly realizing I've never learned how to do the breathing part with your face in the water.
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So I fake it.
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Not well.
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And I thought I would never get to the end of that 25 meter lane.
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But the coach just said, well, we have a starting point, so we're gonna start working on things.
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And that's what we did.
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Each session, he would give us a couple things to work on so that we could get a little bit more competent each time.
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Eventually, I graduated to the lowest actual swimming lane.
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And I was sure I didn't belong there yet.
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I felt like I'll never be able to keep up with these folks.
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They're all doing this workout like it's nothing.
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And I'm struggling to get from one end of the pool to the other.
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And my race, the shortest possible triathlon there is, involves a 750 meter swim, which is about half a mile.
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Might as well be 10 miles as far as I'm concerned.
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About a month in one of the guys on the team says to me, eventually you'll be able to swim a mile like you walk a mile.
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That sounds fairly unattainable, but it plants the idea in my head.
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Maybe this could eventually feel easy?
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I keep working.
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I keep doing what the coaches tell me, and sure enough, I start to get better.
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I start to be able to swim first a hundred, then 200, then 400 meters without stopping.
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But there was another problem.
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I still had the bike and the run to deal with.
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I get copies of the complete training plan, and it's super complicated.
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Tons of shorthand I don't understand, and it feels like there's about five activities every day that I'm supposed to be doing.
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I was behind almost from day one.
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And the more I fell behind, the more stressed out I got.
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Then I went to a couple of bike and run coaching sessions and basically learned that I didn't really know much about how to bike or run either.
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That my technique was terrible.
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I wasn't doing things the way I should for optimal performance.
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So now I'm worrying about I'm not doing it right and I'm falling behind on the workout plan.
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And, and, and.
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It got to the point where one day I thought, I've gotta do just one thing where I feel competent.
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I'm just feeling like I'm incompetent at every piece of this.
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So I went for a long, hard, challenging hike in the mountains, where I feel my most competent.
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It was in April.
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There was still snow on the ground.
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The trail was a combination of snow and mud, slippery as can be.
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The air was cold, but the sun was shining and it felt warm on my back.
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I took a few deep breaths of clear mountain air and for the first time in a while began to relax.
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Even as my boots squished through the snow and the mud, I picked up my pace and I was happy as could be.
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Finally, I was doing something I know how to do.
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And with every stride, I felt more like myself, more grounded, more solid, more capable.
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I found the perfect lunch rock with a view.
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And I sat down on that cold but welcoming rock, and I'm staring out at mountainsides covered in early spring blossoms and just the first fuzzy yellow green of leaves beginning to bud, and that view is stretching for miles in front of me.
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I felt fully at home and fully grounded in my own capabilities again.
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And I thought to myself, I am gonna do this triathlon.
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There's gotta be a way to train for it that's not so complicated.
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I'm gonna find the simplest possible training plan that will still be effective and I'll do that.
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So when I got home, I found a book online, I bought it, and I started using the super simple, stripped down training plan.
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I didn't worry about whether my bike and run technique was optimal.
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I looked to the book for advice on what's the best way to start from zero and build your capacity at a reasonable pace.
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And wouldn't you know it, the day the book arrived was the exact amount of weeks before the race that the book said, this is the minimum number of weeks you need to train safely.
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I had gotten that book at exactly the right time to begin that training plan.
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I followed it.
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And I kept going to swim practice.
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And one day I swam 750 meters without stopping.
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It was then I knew that I was gonna be able to do the swim in this race.
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It might not be pretty, but I knew I could do it.
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So race day arrives.
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The race is being held at a state park with a campground.
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I drive down the night before and I set up my camp.
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I wake up before dawn and I have a little breakfast in the dark, making sure to get something in the tank before the race.
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I go down to the body marking area where they take a magic marker and they write your race number on your arm and your leg in great big writing so that they can spot you from a distance.
00:08:23.475 --> 00:08:25.096
And then I go set up my transition area.
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I put my bike in the stand.
00:08:27.651 --> 00:08:29.300
I have my bike shoes and my running shoes.
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I got my hydration and nutrition kit.
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I've got a little towel so I can dry off after the swim.
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Got all my stuff, I'm ready.
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And now there's nothing to do but wait.
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So the nerves start creeping in.
00:08:41.150 --> 00:08:44.571
I'm starting to feel my heart rate go up and my breathing get a little rapid.
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I try to take deep breaths to calm myself.
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I go down to the lake and I'm standing there in the cold wet sand, doing deep breathing and yoga, just calming and centering myself.
00:08:56.317 --> 00:08:58.687
But I didn't know yet that I had made a mistake.
00:08:59.186 --> 00:09:05.206
For the swim start, you can choose whether to swim with your age group or with a category called novice.
00:09:05.275 --> 00:09:09.176
I figured I belonged in the novice category, so that's what I signed up for.
00:09:09.505 --> 00:09:13.645
I figured that would be less stressful than all those super competitive people in the age groups.
00:09:14.145 --> 00:09:19.620
It turned out that I was a lot better prepared for this race than most of the people in the novice group.
00:09:20.341 --> 00:09:26.451
I wasn't great by any means, but I was confident that I could swim those 750 meters without it being an issue.
00:09:27.140 --> 00:09:28.971
And I'd never been afraid of open water.
00:09:29.000 --> 00:09:30.230
I grew swimming in it.
00:09:31.010 --> 00:09:37.760
But what I didn't know is that for a lot of people, the open water aspect of the swim is the scariest part.
00:09:38.534 --> 00:09:40.544
So I get in the water and I hold back.
00:09:40.544 --> 00:09:42.225
I don't wanna be the first to start swimming.
00:09:42.644 --> 00:09:46.154
I'll just hang here at the back of the pack and that'll feel much more calm.
00:09:46.845 --> 00:09:47.565
Wrong.
00:09:48.375 --> 00:09:50.955
I quickly catch up to most of the novice swimmers.
00:09:51.014 --> 00:09:56.024
And then I begin to realize,all around me a lot of people are panicking.
00:09:56.595 --> 00:10:00.884
They're flailing and thrashing, grabbing for the kayaks that are there for support.
00:10:01.034 --> 00:10:04.184
Cutting in front of me, trying to find something to grab onto.
00:10:04.544 --> 00:10:05.654
It's chaos.
00:10:06.154 --> 00:10:18.647
It takes a long time just to get through the thicket of panicking swimmers, but then I get out into fairly clear open water and I'm able to swim about two thirds of the course, more or less without interference.
00:10:19.096 --> 00:10:22.397
I finish the swim and I feel this rush of relief.
00:10:22.667 --> 00:10:23.356
I did it.
00:10:23.856 --> 00:10:26.856
I wade out of the water and I head for the transition area.
00:10:27.532 --> 00:10:34.701
I run across the gritty sand on the beach, and that feels really grounding to feel the sand between my toes and gritting beneath my feet.
00:10:35.152 --> 00:10:40.072
And then I hit the grass, which still has dew on it, and it's cool and refreshing.
00:10:40.642 --> 00:10:42.682
Plus it wipes the sand off my feet.
00:10:43.672 --> 00:10:49.072
I get to transition, towel off a little and get my bike jersey on and my bike shoes, and I'm ready to go.
00:10:49.672 --> 00:10:54.231
I hop on the bike and I get going a little bit and I clip in and I'm feeling good.
00:10:54.966 --> 00:11:00.187
Now since I was so late getting out of the water, I'm already near the end of the group for the bike, but it's fine.
00:11:00.606 --> 00:11:04.956
And I'm riding this clunker of a hybrid that weighs about a thousand pounds.
00:11:05.256 --> 00:11:15.456
So going uphill is really slow and a lot of work, and I'm watching a lot of people zipping by on their ultralight road bikes and feeling really envious.
00:11:16.392 --> 00:11:25.302
But I don't really care because at one point out in the middle of this long, straight stretch of Country road, the sun breaks through and it's warm on my back.
00:11:25.692 --> 00:11:30.701
The wind's hitting my face, and there's this huge field of golden flowers.
00:11:31.451 --> 00:11:38.001
I don't know what they are, but they're just beautiful in the sunshine, and they're giving off this sweet, fragrant smell.
00:11:38.542 --> 00:11:40.881
And I look around and I think, this is amazing.
00:11:41.511 --> 00:11:43.221
I'm having such a good time.
00:11:43.552 --> 00:11:49.942
I'm so happy in that moment just to be there and to be at this point more than halfway through my race and feeling pretty great.
00:11:51.006 --> 00:11:51.772
I keep on going.
00:11:52.447 --> 00:11:57.099
There's a bunch more hills to climb and each of them gets a little harder, but I'm doing it.
00:11:57.599 --> 00:12:00.729
I get to the end of the bike course and I remember to clip out.
00:12:01.544 --> 00:12:06.674
I get off the bike and I put my feet on the ground, and my legs are jello.
00:12:07.215 --> 00:12:08.294
I almost fall down.
00:12:08.955 --> 00:12:10.754
There's nothing there.
00:12:11.144 --> 00:12:13.034
My legs just give way.
00:12:13.534 --> 00:12:21.845
I walk to the transition area, holding myself up by my arms pressed into my bike, as my wobbly legs try to figure out how to walk on land.
00:12:22.745 --> 00:12:25.804
And I'm thinking, how am I gonna run if my legs don't work?
00:12:26.585 --> 00:12:32.945
But I regroup in transition, I change into my running shoes, sit down for a couple of minutes, get some electrolytes into me.
00:12:33.815 --> 00:12:40.309
And by the time I'm walking out of transition to start the run course, things are still a little wobbly, but I feel like, okay.
00:12:40.309 --> 00:12:43.779
I can at least walk, and probably in a minute or two I can run.
00:12:44.740 --> 00:12:45.850
And then I see the hill.
00:12:46.615 --> 00:12:50.544
I had visions of starting the run course strong and striding out at a good clip.
00:12:51.384 --> 00:12:55.705
And I'm confronted with this nearly vertical hill, straight up.
00:12:56.205 --> 00:12:58.575
Well, that's not a run, that's a walk.
00:12:59.279 --> 00:13:02.759
So I walk up the hill because that's what's possible in that moment.
00:13:03.543 --> 00:13:07.953
Thankfully, when I get to the top of the hill, things level out a little bit and I can start running.
00:13:08.644 --> 00:13:13.474
Not super fast, but I'm running and my legs are getting sturdier as I go.
00:13:14.073 --> 00:13:17.433
Figuring out how to function in that motion instead of the cycling motion.
00:13:18.278 --> 00:13:21.489
I have to say I don't remember much of the run course.
00:13:21.639 --> 00:13:22.359
It's kind of a blur.
00:13:23.214 --> 00:13:28.464
But I remember when I got to the only aid station, slowing down long enough to take a drink.
00:13:28.913 --> 00:13:38.783
And I'm so grateful because by this time the sun is now hot and it's beating down on my head and I can feel that I'm starting to get overheated and a little dehydrated.
00:13:39.504 --> 00:13:43.313
I take a drink of water, which feels so good sliding down my throat.
00:13:44.090 --> 00:13:49.455
Then I see some volunteers offering to pour water on your head and I make a beeline for them.
00:13:50.085 --> 00:13:54.044
As soon as that cool water hits my head, it feels so much better.
00:13:54.465 --> 00:14:01.465
I stand there feeling the water running through my hair and down my back cooling me and bringing me back to life.
00:14:02.571 --> 00:14:05.870
The next thing I remember is coming down the chute to the finish line.
00:14:06.831 --> 00:14:08.681
I'm exhausted by this point.
00:14:08.711 --> 00:14:09.551
It's hard going.
00:14:09.971 --> 00:14:13.571
I'm tempted to walk, but there's some pride involved.
00:14:14.530 --> 00:14:15.971
And then I hear the noise.
00:14:16.780 --> 00:14:25.253
Dozens of racers who've already finished are gathered around the finish line, cheering and encouraging all of us who are just now finishing the course.
00:14:25.312 --> 00:14:28.732
They're shouting and they're cheering, and there's cowbells and they're saying, you got this.
00:14:28.732 --> 00:14:29.302
Come on.
00:14:29.482 --> 00:14:30.263
You made it.
00:14:30.763 --> 00:14:36.663
Suddenly I feel about 10 feet tall and I find a burst of energy to run across that finish line.
00:14:37.163 --> 00:14:37.798
I did it.
00:14:38.488 --> 00:14:41.998
I met this big challenge I set for myself and I made it.
00:14:42.498 --> 00:14:43.488
I felt so good.
00:14:43.488 --> 00:14:51.628
And then there was this added joy and energy from the other racers cheering us on and high fives all around as each of us crossed the finish line.
00:14:52.379 --> 00:14:55.620
It's really hard to imagine a better finish for my first race.
00:14:56.129 --> 00:14:58.950
It wasn't perfect, but it was really good.
00:14:59.610 --> 00:15:04.259
And what I realized is that there were some powerful lessons in that experience for me.
00:15:05.150 --> 00:15:08.900
I learned that good enough is actually better than perfect.
00:15:09.471 --> 00:15:17.451
Because if I had tried to be perfect and follow the exact super complicated and very involved training plan, I wouldn't have been able to do it.
00:15:17.660 --> 00:15:18.860
It was too overwhelming.
00:15:18.860 --> 00:15:23.600
It was just too much to process in too short a time, and I would've stopped.
00:15:23.750 --> 00:15:24.105
I would've quit.
00:15:25.284 --> 00:15:27.955
Instead, I found a simpler path.
00:15:28.315 --> 00:15:32.664
I looked for the most direct line to the desired result, and I took it.
00:15:33.414 --> 00:15:35.485
And it was fine.
00:15:36.400 --> 00:15:45.750
I still have a lot more to learn to become a better cyclist, a better runner, a better swimmer, but what I had at that point was good enough to achieve my goal.
00:15:46.379 --> 00:15:55.769
And achieving that goal felt just as sweet with the training I'd been able to do, as it would have if I'd done everything perfectly and according to the designed training plan.
00:15:56.735 --> 00:16:05.046
The other important lesson was that the bigger the challenge you take on, the more important it is to find people to help and support you on the journey.
00:16:05.758 --> 00:16:12.177
Without the support of the swim coaches and my teammates, there's no way I would've been able to accomplish that 750 meter swim.
00:16:12.988 --> 00:16:22.288
And I've continued to work with the coaches, and now I'm happy to say that I absolutely can not only swim a mile, but a couple of miles, like I can walk a couple of miles.
00:16:22.947 --> 00:16:23.758
It feels good.
00:16:24.148 --> 00:16:26.008
It feels easy, just like walking.
00:16:26.883 --> 00:16:32.283
Another reason I told this story is to show the power of story to engage.
00:16:32.783 --> 00:16:34.894
If you think about the story I just shared with you.
00:16:35.394 --> 00:16:42.700
Even if you would never in a million years consider doing a triathlon, did you find yourself drawn into the story?
00:16:43.200 --> 00:16:52.705
And if you did, do you know why Maybe you're a triathlete and you were interested in the experience, but it's more likely that's not something that's even remotely on your radar.
00:16:53.184 --> 00:16:56.674
And yet you probably felt yourself being pulled in.
00:16:57.331 --> 00:16:58.292
Why did that happen?
00:16:58.792 --> 00:17:03.615
Part of the reason I shared the story is to be able to talk about what just happened here.
00:17:04.180 --> 00:17:06.190
What your experience as a listener was.
00:17:06.490 --> 00:17:15.266
And why it's different with that story than it would be if I did what we usually do when we're sharing information with decision makers.
00:17:15.836 --> 00:17:18.326
We tend to do the"just the facts" version.
00:17:19.086 --> 00:17:24.036
And If I were to give you the,"just the facts" version of the story I just told, it would be a lot shorter.
00:17:24.536 --> 00:17:27.506
And we always wanna be concise and get to the point with decision makers.
00:17:27.506 --> 00:17:28.826
We don't wanna waste their time.
00:17:29.424 --> 00:17:33.988
But when we do that, we give up the opportunity to engage them more fully.
00:17:34.901 --> 00:17:40.125
if I give you"just the facts" version of that same story, it would go something like this.
00:17:40.653 --> 00:17:45.272
I decided to do a triathlon and so I joined a team so I could get some training and coaching.
00:17:45.853 --> 00:17:50.133
I knew the swim would be the hardest part for me, so I really focused on that.
00:17:50.432 --> 00:17:57.873
And I got lots of extra coaching there and managed to get enough so that I could do the 750 meter distance for my swim.
00:17:58.423 --> 00:18:02.489
I figured I already knew how to bike and run, so I wasn't too worried about that.
00:18:02.989 --> 00:18:07.826
The only thing about the team was that they had these super involved training plans that really didn't work for me.
00:18:07.826 --> 00:18:13.346
So I just got a book that had a more concise version that was easier for me to follow.
00:18:13.346 --> 00:18:14.717
And it turned out to be good enough.
00:18:15.233 --> 00:18:16.463
I had a pretty good race.
00:18:16.653 --> 00:18:23.503
Some weird stuff happened during the swim where a lot of the novice swimmers who were in front of me kind of freaked out and got in my way.
00:18:23.554 --> 00:18:26.253
And that was difficult, but I managed.
00:18:26.284 --> 00:18:28.294
And then the bike went pretty good.
00:18:28.753 --> 00:18:35.986
I realized that my hybrid bike was definitely not the bike for that job, and I wished I had a road bike, but oh well.
00:18:36.691 --> 00:18:38.211
And then the run was okay.
00:18:38.211 --> 00:18:40.730
I was pretty tired and hot, but I did okay.
00:18:40.760 --> 00:18:46.411
And then at the end it was really cool'cause a bunch of the other racers were there cheering and that was nice.
00:18:47.007 --> 00:18:50.396
So then I finished and I was really happy that I achieved my goal.
00:18:50.616 --> 00:18:55.146
I achieved the challenge that I set for myself and I also got a lot of rehab done, so that was really good.
00:18:55.864 --> 00:19:01.779
That's the"just the facts" version Is that as interesting and compelling as the first version that I shared?
00:19:02.556 --> 00:19:04.882
And if it isn't, what's the difference?
00:19:05.192 --> 00:19:14.905
Why was the first version so much more interesting and engaging than the much quicker, much shorter just the facts" version that I just did?
00:19:15.561 --> 00:19:21.924
And are there any carryover lessons from that comparison to how we're engaging decision makers?
00:19:22.805 --> 00:19:26.914
I wanna share with you the key elements of a story that actually engages.
00:19:27.622 --> 00:19:32.291
Number one, it engages emotion, it connects to feeling.
00:19:32.291 --> 00:19:35.364
It also connects to the senses.
00:19:35.753 --> 00:19:38.483
Sights, sounds, smells, tastes.
00:19:38.983 --> 00:19:46.714
And it creates an alternate reality, another world that the listener becomes immersed in.
00:19:47.565 --> 00:19:53.234
When you do all three of those things, you have a listener who is fully engaged.
00:19:54.025 --> 00:20:05.595
And what's really interesting is that when that happens, what's going on from a brain science perspective is that there's a bunch of things that are happening at the same time.
00:20:06.246 --> 00:20:13.542
So first of all, when we're being given facts and data, two very small little spots in our brain light up.
00:20:13.942 --> 00:20:15.653
The data processing areas.
00:20:16.252 --> 00:20:20.032
And that's fine, but those don't involve much of the brain.
00:20:20.532 --> 00:20:29.561
When we hear a story that triggers our senses--sight, sound, smell, taste-- huge parts of our brain light up.
00:20:30.061 --> 00:20:32.731
It's involving all different parts of the brain at the same time.
00:20:33.001 --> 00:20:37.432
And when we engage emotions, other huge parts of the brain light up.
00:20:38.031 --> 00:20:40.162
And a couple of phenomena start to occur.
00:20:40.534 --> 00:20:42.880
There's a phenomenon called neural coupling.
00:20:43.509 --> 00:20:55.432
Where, when a story is being told that includes those three ingredients, the listener's brain lights up in all the same places that the storyteller's brain is lighting up.
00:20:55.932 --> 00:20:58.092
They're actually mirroring one another.
00:20:58.592 --> 00:21:01.580
And that's the indicator of total engagement.
00:21:02.371 --> 00:21:16.488
The other thing that happens is this thing called narrative transportation, which is a fancy way of saying that the listener is transported into the world that is being created by the storyteller, and they're fully immersed in it.
00:21:16.607 --> 00:21:25.589
And when that happens, they're experiencing all the emotions and the sights and the sounds and the smells and the tension that are woven into the story.
00:21:26.089 --> 00:21:30.115
And when that happens, a bunch of brain chemicals get released.
00:21:30.615 --> 00:21:36.788
And that's causes more retention and I've heard it phrased this way.
00:21:37.151 --> 00:21:39.885
It causes the listener to see things they can't unsee.
00:21:40.705 --> 00:21:43.660
They visualized a thing in a new way.
00:21:44.079 --> 00:21:47.289
They visualized an experience and now it's in their head.
00:21:48.009 --> 00:21:56.435
That image, that sensation, whatever it is, that impression is now planted in their brain and it's gonna stay with'em.
00:21:57.182 --> 00:22:00.359
And that's what we want to be able to do when we're engaging decision makers.
00:22:00.737 --> 00:22:05.010
We want them so in it that they can't forget.
00:22:05.070 --> 00:22:08.730
They can't ignore the important stuff that we're telling them.
00:22:09.421 --> 00:22:11.611
And it becomes especially important with data.
00:22:12.030 --> 00:22:21.060
Because data is so easy to glaze over when we're hearing facts and data because those two tiny bits of the brain are involved and not much else, and the rest of the brain is off doing whatever it's doing.
00:22:21.901 --> 00:22:25.891
But when the whole brain is immersed, that's when you get retention.
00:22:25.891 --> 00:22:27.030
That's when you get engagement.
00:22:27.830 --> 00:22:32.061
So if you think about the immersive version of the story that I shared with you.
00:22:32.561 --> 00:22:34.271
I did all those things.
00:22:34.771 --> 00:22:42.477
I described the emotions, the worry, the nervousness, the stress, the elation, the exhaustion.
00:22:42.876 --> 00:22:47.977
All of that was described in detail of how it felt to be in that experience.
00:22:48.477 --> 00:22:55.507
I described the sights and the sounds and the smells of the environment in each of the parts of the story.
00:22:56.007 --> 00:22:58.606
And then there's one more ingredient that's really important.
00:22:59.027 --> 00:23:02.845
Which is that a good story builds tension and then releases it.
00:23:03.345 --> 00:23:06.644
And if you're telling a longer story, you do that repeatedly.
00:23:07.095 --> 00:23:13.575
But you can do it in a short form with a decision maker just around data where you build tension and release it once.
00:23:14.144 --> 00:23:16.394
But in this case, it was repeated.
00:23:16.934 --> 00:23:24.734
I would get to a place where I thought I was in good shape and I had overcome a thing, and then another challenge appears and the cycle begins again.
00:23:25.428 --> 00:23:28.651
It's that building anticipation and then releasing it.
00:23:28.740 --> 00:23:31.230
Our brains love to anticipate.
00:23:31.260 --> 00:23:32.431
It's what they're built to do.
00:23:32.830 --> 00:23:37.181
So anything that builds anticipation pulls the listener in even more.
00:23:37.988 --> 00:23:39.382
So let me ask you.
00:23:40.041 --> 00:23:46.221
Did you experience any of that with the"just the facts" version of the story that I shared afterwards?
00:23:46.858 --> 00:23:48.659
Which of those stories had you leaning in?
00:23:48.749 --> 00:23:52.229
Which of those stories had you, eh, not that interested?
00:23:53.086 --> 00:23:58.425
There's much more to talk about with how we build effective stories, especially around data.
00:23:58.516 --> 00:24:00.945
And we'll be digging into that in future episodes.
00:24:01.215 --> 00:24:14.376
But for today, I wanted to introduce you to a really clear example of a story that is deliberately built to engage, and then a version of that same story that's just the facts.
00:24:15.621 --> 00:24:20.250
And that you can tell by your own response, was not particularly engaging.
00:24:20.993 --> 00:24:27.586
Some food for thought as you think about how you're going to plan your next conversation with a decision maker.
00:24:28.125 --> 00:24:32.655
Thanks for listening and I'll see you in the next episode right here on the Nonprofit Power Podcast.
